The pull to quit is very natural. Everyone of us has had to learn not to give up when the task before us becomes difficult or dangerous or just plain pointless. We’d rather just walk away and just do something else more productive… or maybe just pain-free! It’s parents… teachers… coaches… and mentors… that stick their nose in our faces… and tell us… “DON’T quit!” “DON’T give up!” “KEEP going!”. This December… in the throws of the hardest, most intensely painful parts of full-blown labor… my wife locked eyes just inches from my face and confessed… “Jeff, I just can’t DO this anymore!” At that point… it’s hard to find the words to say… “Honey, despite everything in you WANTING to quit… You just can’t!” More »
Scripture: Matthew 6:25-34
Although you might not verbalize it, I’m sure the thought goes through your mind… “What if…?” What if he loses his job? What if it’s… cancer? What if I’m not good enough for them anymore? What if they grow up and quit God? What if my parents find out? What if I fail? What if they say “No?” What if we never get back on top of these bills? What if he doesn’t love me anymore? What if I’m not accepted? What if I’m… pregnant? What if I never get pregnant? What if we lose the house? What if I’ve reached the top and this is as good as it gets? What if I end up alone? What if?… More »
Trouble has a way of narrowing our focus… not necessarily in a good way. You know, you hit your thumb with a hammer and pretty much all you can think about is the throbbing of your thumb. It narrows your focus. You let somebody ridicule you, and all you can hear in your head is the echo of their words. Fail miserably and what will haunt you are all the things you should have done differently – only AFTER you can’t do anything about it. “I WISHED I would have done this… IF I ONLY would have done that.” And it tends to FREEZE our brains in place.
When trouble comes into our lives… it has a way of distorting our gaze. And we find it difficult to see much else. At times in my life… when more things are going wrong than right… the first thing to go… is the wide-angle view… because I’m riveted on the close-up! Using a magnifying glass on our problems… even a harmless spider can look like a hairy, horrifying monster! Yet, in reality, in keeping the wide-angle view through our problems… instead of looking at Goliath with the close-up view and cowering, saying, “He’s so big! We could never kill him!” With the wide-angle view, young David looked at the SAME giant and said, “He’s so big! I can’t MISS!”… More »
So… can we TALK? Last week we learned the reasons it isn’t as easy as we might think. But what we learned last week is that the problem in communication isn’t with our mouths… but with our hearts. Sometimes the problem isn’t our WORDS… or even our SKILLS… the problem is with our HEARTS. Because, out of the overflow of the HEART… the mouth speaks! Secondly, we find it difficult to talk because we don’t realize that all talking is an act of trusting. What we want to say we’re afraid to say… because we’re not really certain that the person listening… will turn around and use it against us. And after repeated painful attempts… We find ourselves weighing carefully the explosive topics… and permanently steer clear of them… and communication… clams-up. Third, we fail to recognize the presence of distortions in our talking. We looked at a number of those distortions last week. And, finally, we mistakenly think that our ways of communicating will work. We speak for effect… to force responses… and it’s not talking at all… it’s just two people manipulating each other with actions and words.
Today we want to focus on how to improve... More »
We’ve taken a look at the following aspects of marriage: That it was God’s idea in the first place. We’ve asked the question, “Why not have sex with anyone?” We’ve asked the question from both sides, “Can I respect You?” And we’ve realized, with God’s power… and two people surrendered in a relationship with Jesus… it’s possible! And now I want to get back and do a couple of bonus messages. I want to ask and answer the question, “Can we talk?” See this Gary Larson cartoon? It says, “After many years of marital bliss tension enters the
No marriage is bulletproof! … More »
SERMON SERIES Stay Married
SERMON TITLE Can I Respect You – part2
SERMON DATE 05/04/2008
SPEAKER Jeff Paschall
TEXT Ephesians 5
Last week we saw, that because of sin, Conflict has ravaged the human landscape. It is the main cause why a lot of marriages go belly up. And now for relationships to even have a chance… men and women must have roles.
Unfortunately, both genders… are naturally disposed to hate their assignments… Two of the most common complaints I hear women say are, 1) “My husband won’t take the lead spiritually in the marriage. You know, he’s a leader at work… but when it comes to the home and the marriage… he doesn’t do anything.” And, 2) “My husband misuses his leadership. He orders us around and he just keeps us under his thumb.”
On the other hand, the ONE complaint I hear about the wives is this, “My wife is nagging. She’s on my back, she’s not on my side. At every turn… she uses every means to manipulate and control… She ruins me publicly with her words. My wife is a constant and unrelenting source of discouragement.” More »
SERMON SERIES Stay Married
SERMON TITLE Can I Respect You
SERMON DATE 04/27/2008
SPEAKER Jeff Paschall
TEXT Gen. 3
A woman took her husband to a doctor for a check up. And before they left, the doctor pulled the woman aside and said, “You know, stress is killing your husband. If you don’t make some dramatic changes, he is going to die. So let me make these recommendations. Each morning fix him a healthy breakfast and send him off in a good mood. At lunch time, talk to him. Make him a warm, delicious meal or at least encourage him. Third, prepare a nice dinner and avoid complaining about household chores. And fourth, have sex with him several times weekly and try to satisfy him emotionally. And on the way home the husband asked his wife, “Well, what’d the doctor say?” She said, “You’re going to die.” More »
SERMON SERIES Stay Married
SERMON TITLE Why Not Have Sex With Anyone? – part 2
SERMON DATE 04/20/2008
SPEAKER Jeff Paschall
TEXT 1 Cor. 6
We talked about this last week… we live in a sexually supercharged society. So why not have sex with whomever you want? Typically, Christians respond without thinking very hard… But did you know, as we began to take a look at Scripture last week, the Bible actually provides cogent… reasonable… and today… you will see… extremely weighty explanations for avoiding casual sex.
TO catch us up from where we left off… instead of just thumping them over the head… telling them to “Just stop it! Paul says, “PEOPLE THINK!!! Ask yourself a few questions!” Firstly, is it constructive? “Okay, WE ARE FREE IN CHRIST!!! AND SINNING DOESN’T GET YOU UNSAVED!!! BUT DOES IT OCCUR TO YOU… FOR A MINUTE… to make moral decisions that benefit you… If not you, how about OTHERS… if not others, how about JESUS? Does Jesus’ best interest occur to you at all? AT ALL? Hmm… It doesn’t do you… others… OR JESUS… any good… and you still do it? Hmm…
SERMON SERIES Stay Married
SERMON TITLE Why Not Have Sex With Anyone?
SERMON DATE 04/13/2008
SPEAKER Jeff Paschall
TEXT 1 Cor. 6
Let me begin today with a disclaimer. This message does carry a PG-13 rating. I say that tongue-in-cheek mostly because, when it comes to talking about sex in church… we typically skirt the issue. We don’t talk very directly… we deal with it hopefully as sensitively as we can… but rarely do we get specific enough where people can actually say… “Now, he’s talking straight!” Or, “Okay, that makes sense!” So, as a disclaimer… the topic is sex… and I plan on speaking very straightforwardly and pointedly… and go into detail about how God made us sexual beings… and He has something to say to us about this… so if you need to… If this seems uncomfortable to you or you’re a parent who wants to have more control over the dissemination of information to your children… no big deal… excuse yourself… download the message later and pick it apart. More »
SERMON SERIES Stay Married
SERMON TITLE Why Get Married – part 2
SERMON DATE 04/06/2008
SPEAKER Jeff Paschall
TEXT Selected Scripture
On rare occasion… I’ve have given people the finger. The last time I remember it… was about 3 years ago… It was mid-June… the freshness and excitement of the beginning of summer was in the air… there’s a certain predictable sort of electricity… the streets and and shopping centers come alive with students from high schools and colleges who are freshly freed from being pent up in classes for nine months.
I don’t take what happened too seriously. But I was driving down the 15 and a car full of college girls pulled up next to me on the freeway… More »